For the folks who find carols and mall shopping overwhelming. For those of us who do not enjoy the smell of peppermint and pine and eggnog. Or for those who sort of enjoy the season, but still enjoy a wry giggle.
Dear Virginia, Santa Isn’t Real. Grow the Fuck up.
Don We Now Our Gay Apparel. (Nice sweater).
Have you ever actually taken a ride in a one-horse open sleigh? It’s uncomfortable and bumpy and cold, believe me you.
Ignore the World. Let them know that Christmas-time is OVER.
Happy Hanukah. Sorry about the Santa crap. Enjoy your Chinese dinner on December 25th.
Gold, Frankenscence and Myrrh? Just what every young family living away in a manger needs. Some wise men.
…Later on, we’ll conspire; As we dream by the fire; To face unafraid, the plans that we made; Let’s go kill Juanita Bunderman
Jingle bells. (Stating the obvious, there)