Tag Archives: musings

Morose Musings on Mollusks, Mullets and Mercury

These are merely random musings, and do not necessitate any 9-1-1 calls.

I hate Hump Day, and I hate people who say Hump Day. I’m pretty sure literally everyone feels the same way.

I want to slather Vaseline on my face and then wrap it in swaddling towels with a tiny hole in the front for looking out. Then just lay on my couch watching Suze Orman lecturing some dude about his IRA. Stupid idiot. You need a Roth.

Maybe I could order a box of romance books and then set them on fire. I doubt my landlady would appreciate that, but what does she know of hearbreak? Continue reading